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Kerrie LaRosaParent Coach

Tuesday Tip: Think Outside the Candy Wrapper

10/31/2012

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Picture
Happy Halloween!

As the time for trick-or-treating gets closer, the anticipation builds. It is an opportunity to dress up in costume, to enjoy the creative decorations and of course to collect candy. That is what makes Halloween fun, right?
 
But, what if you have a child that cannot have candy because of food allergies,  or the candy negatively impacts behavior, you have a child who is cavity-prone,  or you just don't want your child to eat 10 pounds of candy?

Here are a few ideas of ways to manage the loot:

Participate in the Teal Pumpkin Project: 
Offer trick-or-treaters non-food items to support a safe and fun Halloween for those with allergies. Put a teal pumpkin outside of your house to raise awareness and alert children with allergies that you are offering safe options. 
 
Set up your own candy market:
This works especially well for children who are unable to eat the candy because of food allergies or diet issues. You can give your child the opportunity to trade in some of their candy for healthier/safer options, toys, or money.
  
Support the troops:
You can take your excess candy to a participating dentist and your child will receive money or toys in exchange. The candy will then be sent to our  troops overseas. For more information and for a participating dentist near you  click here.

​Don't be afraid to set limits:

You can manage your child's Halloween candy intake by limiting the quantity  they consume and when the consume their candy so it doesn't negatively impact their sleeping, learning or nutrition intake. Give them some choices within those limits: you can choose which candy you can have / you can have one after  lunch OR one after dinner.
 
For those children who have allergies, Halloween may be more difficult. Here are a few tips I learned from a mom well-educated on the subject with a very special boy who happens to have  food allergies:
  
Set up some rules ahead of time (that the whole family can follow):
 - Your child can graciously accept whatever candy is offered as long as it has a wrapper.
- No eating any candy until getting home.
- Once you are home, go through the candy and put aside any candy that is unsafe.
- You can allow your child to trade in all the unsafe candy for safe
candy/treats/toys or money that you have in the house or donate it to the troops.
 
Of course you want to take the normal precautions you would take to avoid an incident and cross-contamination. Be sure to discuss any questions or concerns with your child's pediatrician.
 
Hopefully your child will be able to enjoy the same Halloween experience as other children while staying safe.  For more resources and ideas about celebrating Halloween with food allergies go to:
www.kidswithfoodallergies.org/resourcespre.php?id=42 
 
 Happy Halloween! Safe Trick-or-Treating!

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Entertaining children when stuck inside

10/30/2012

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My thoughts are with all of the people affected my Sandy and hope that everyone is safe.

We were fortunate enough to still have power and our biggest challenge is combating the boredom from being inside for several days. With school out of session and the cold, rainy weather preventing us from going anywhere, we have to be a bit creative. And, we are more likely to spend more time inside as we settle into fall and winter looms around the corner, we are more likely to spend more time inside. It can be quite a challenge to entertain an energetic child indoors. Here are a few ideas.

Stimulate the senses: sensory toys utilize the five senses and encourages a child's curiosity and self-expression. They can also be very calming and are often very useful with very active children (as long as you are careful not to overstimulate). Sensory balls, scented bubbles, water play and musical instruments are all examples of sensory toys. But, here are some ways to create your own sensory toys at home (the process of making them can be an activity in and of itself).

- Fun in a box.
Fill a box, plastic bin or cookie sheet with dried food such as beans, pasta or rice (with a spill mat underneath to catch the mess). Let your child explore  using kitchen tools (measuring spoons, cups and funnels) or create a construction site with diggers, bulldozers and dump trucks.

- Create your own fill and spill toy. Grab a bucket, empty box or large cup and place soft, child safe items or toys in the bucket and let your child spill them out and fill them back up (you would be amazed how long that can go on!)

- Guess what? Fill a bag or a box with toys or household objects. Without looking, let your reach in and feel for an object and guess what it is. If your child is not verbal yet, just enjoy the process of feeling for a toy and pulling it out to see what it is. To enhance learning, describe the way the object looks and feels. 

Get Crafty: Rainy days are great for getting creative. If you are worried about your artistic talents, remember that for children it is about the process and not the product, so have fun!  

- Get ready for the holidays: make your own holiday  decorations, cards, wrapping paper, gift bags.

- Create a mosaic: let your child rip up different color paper (or magazines), then glue the pieces onto a separate paper.

- Stuck with boxes until recycling day? Cut out doors and windows and make houses from those boxes. Let  your child decorate the house with paints, markers and stickers. 

- Children love to cook and bake! Probably won't work if you lost power. Give your child their own safe tasks (including helping clean up the mess!) 

-Make your own play dough. Here are some recipes (some don't require cooking if you have lost power): http://fun.familyeducation.com/sculpting/recipes/37040.html. For added sensory stimulation,  add essential oils to make it aromatic.

Oldies but Goodies: These classics can cure boredom:

- Turn your living room into a fort.
- Play hide-and-go-seek. For a new spin on an old game: hide a toy or stuffed animal and go looking for it together.
- Go on a scavenger hunt: create a list of items for your child to find around the house.
- Enjoy old games like "simon says", "red light/green light" or "mother may I". Not only are these games great for rainy days, but they teach regulation and listening  skills.


Please share your ideas by commenting here.
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Decorating your Child's Room with their Help.

10/28/2012

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In a recent post, I wrote about including your child in the process of decorating their room when moving into a new house. There may be other times you want to have your child help decorate her new room: when moving from a crib to a twin bed; if your child is changing rooms; or you are celebrating your child growing up. Whatever the reason, I have some tips on how to make it a successful project. Please read this guest post I wrote for Mission Decorate (my go-to home decorating blog. http://www.missiondecorate.com/2012/10/decorating-your-childs-room-with-their.html
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Finding the humor in parenting

10/24/2012

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One calm and quiet morning, the birds were chirping, the sun was
shining and the children in the house were listening well and playing nicely together. So, I let my guard down. I stepped out of the room to put a few dishes away and then it got really quiet - too quiet. It was the calm before the storm. Within a matter of minutes, my son was running around with no pants, there was toilet paper (fortunately unused) all over the living room, the bathroom door was locked (although nobody was in it), my daughter was crying because it was naptime, and my mother-in-law would knock at the door at any moment. 

Yikes! Parenting can certainly be a challenge, even for those trained to tackle these tough moments. I took lots of deep breaths and calmly addressed one issue at a time. I put my daughter down for a nap, convinced my son that he had to wear pants and clean up the toilet paper in order to go to the park with Grandma, and I got out the screwdriver and fixed the bathroom lock, all before my mother-in-law arrived.

In the moment I was ready to scream. This was not how I envisioned my life as a parent - talking to myself to calm down, fixing doorknobs while the kids jumped on couches and "toilet-papered" my living room. Looking back, it is a pretty funny image. And, it is all part of parenting. Living in the moment, taking lots of deep breaths and finding the humor in it all.
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Moving Part 3: We Made It!

10/16/2012

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The moment has come....you have arrived in your new house. It is time to make it your home.
 
Unpack your children's rooms first. This will help them feel settled and will give them a place to sleep at naptime and bedtime. Include your child in the unpacking process (as much as is practically possible). Your child will enjoy pulling out their toys from the boxes and can help put his toys and clothes away.Consider having your child help decorate the room with room decals or picking out paint colors. Having some control and ownership over their new space will help him adjust more quickly to his new environment.  If your child is too young or makes more of a mess than you can handle there are a few other options. You can send your child out with another caretaker to explore the neighborhood or if you have extra space, allow your child to unpack his toy boxes - this will definitely keep him very occupied while you unpack!
 
Mix the old with the new. Make sure you keep some of the same furniture, pictures, decorations from your old house to create a familiar environment. When possible, include your child when purchasing or finding a place for new items. The more a child is involved, the easier it will be to adjust to their new surroundings. 
 
Explore! Take a break from unpacking to explore your new neighborhood and meet your neighbors. It will be good for both you and your children to have some fun and get acclimated to your new surroundings.

As, I mentioned in the previous blogs, try and maintain some of your routines. Sleep and good nutrition will be helpful for getting everyone through this period. 

Finally, I know there are a lot of design blogs out there, but if you have children and like DIY projects, then Mission Decorate (www.missiondecorate.com) is the place to get ideas for your new home. I enjoy reading Jill's posts because she is creative, yet practical and gives tips on making your house beautiful and kid-friendly (on a budget!). Jill also inspires me as the seasons change, to decorate my home for the holidays and gives me ideas of projects to do with the kids.

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Best Laid Plans

10/10/2012

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I love to plan. My husband would say that I love to make a plan to plan (I think that is a bit of an exaggeration). Planning helps me feel organized amid the chaos of living with a toddler. And, I justify it knowing that planning is very important when you have a child. Children thrive on routine which requires some planning. And, of course you have to remember all the essentials when leaving the house to keep your child clean, well-fed and entertained. 

 
But, I find that with children it is equally important to be flexible. If you have children, you know, that "The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry.” (Robery Burns). Children can be unpredictable and if you plan an outing that deviates from their routine, you may be forced to be flexible or face the consequences (for your child is that a tantrum, refusal to nap, not listening?). A few weeks ago we went to a friend's birthday party and we were hoping to stay long enough to have some cake (I was hoping for the cake as much as my son - I wonder where he gets his sweet tooth?). As much as my son was hoping for that cake, he had different plans. He was tired and he let us know that it was time to leave by crawlling under the table and laying his head on the floor. Since we did not think that was an appropriate napping place, we decided it was time to leave. He fell fast asleep on the car ride home. Sometimes naps are more important than cake!

As much as I wanted that piece of cake, I knew that the best thing for all of us was to go home. I try not to stress about these adjustments to our plans. It is life with children. The more we stress about plans changing, the more our children will. I acknowledge the disappointment when things don't go as planned (my own disappointment as well as my child's) and then put a positive spin on the shift in plans. When our afternoon activity, riding the carousel, did not go as planned, it helped to tell my son, "I know you really wanted to ride on the carousel, but it is closed today, let's go to the playground instead and see how high you can go on the swing".
 
We never know what life is going to bring so we might as well enjoy the adventure along the way!
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Moving, Part 2: The Transition

10/4/2012

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"Greater is our terror of the uknown" Titus Livius. Transitions are often the hardest part of change. It is the unpredictability and fear about how things will turn out that can be most unsettling about any change. For children, this can trigger some feelings of anxiety. As you know, children thrive on routine and structure and may have some trouble when things are less predictable (let's
face it - so do adults!).
 
It is in this transition that we can learn from our children to live in the moment. As distracted as you may be worrying about the next step, keep in mind that your children are focused on the present. Create as much predictability, routine and familiarity as possible during the transition. Try not to stray too far from your normal eating and sleeping schedules. And more importantaly,
maintain some familiarity during eating and sleeping. You can do this by making sure your child can eat from his favorite plate or by reading the same familiar books at bedtime.
 
Don't pack everything away. Your child may not understand here her toys and favorite possessions will end up after packing them away in a box (and unfortunately sometimes things get lost or misplaced during a move). Give your child a small backpack or suitcase and let her pick out her lovey and most prized possessions with her to ease the transition and lessen her anxiety.  
   
If you will be staying elsewhere before moving into your new home, bring your child's sheets, blanket and/or pillow with you so he/she has something familiar at bedtime (don't wash them to maintain that familiar scent from your old home - and save you time!).  Schedule in time to have fun with your
children, perhaps visiting your new neighborhood before you move in. If you are
unable to spend much time playing, try and spend extra time at mealtimes or
bedtimes so that your child is getting extra attention she will need during this
transition.
 
And don't forget about yourself! Try and rest, eat well and if possible,
exercise or take some time for yourself. You need as much energy as you can get
(trust me I know from personal experience!)
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    Kerrie LaRosa is a parent coach and a mother of two children. She draws on her professional expertise and personal experience to provide tired parents with some quick tips, resources and fun anecdotes.

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