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Kerrie LaRosaParent Coach

Candy, Ghosts and Fun, Oh My!

10/29/2013

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Happy Halloween!

The time for trick-or-treating is almost here. And, in my household at least, the anticipation is building!  It is an opportunity to dress up in costume, to enjoy the creative decorations and of course to collect candy. That is what makes Halloween fun, right?
 
But, what if you have a child that cannot have candy because of food allergies, or other dietary reasons.  Or what if you have a child who is afraid of the scary costumes and spooky decorations? Here are a few ideas to make the night more enjoyable despite these concerns:
 
Think Outside the Candy Wrapper:

Whether your child has food allergies or you just don't want them to eat 10 pounds of candy, there are some ways to avoid massive candy consumption without spoiling the fun of trick-or-treating:

Support the troops:
You can take your excess candy to a participating dentist and your child will receive money or toys in exchange. The candy will then be sent to our  troops overseas. For more information and for a participating dentist near you  check out: http://www.halloweencandybuyback.com/
 
Set up your own candy market at home:
Give your child the opportunity to trade in their candy for healthier/safer options, toys, or money.
  
Making Halloween less Spooky:

If you are worried about how your child will respond to some of the scary decorations or costumes, prepare him ahead of time.  Take your child to see the decorations when it is light out. Let your child know that there might be some spooky costumes or decorations  on Halloween, you will be with them and keep them safe.  Tell them these spooky things are not real, but understand that your child still might be afraid of them. Be patient and don't push them beyond their comfort level.  Keep them close, listen to your children and avoid costumes and decorations that are too scary for your child. And, trick or treating does not need to be a marathon. Young children especially will be happy trick or treating at a few houses then returning home to survey their loot and enjoy passing out candy to the trick or treaters that come to your home. Read your child's cues when she is ready to go home. 


I hope you and your family have a happy, healthy and safe Halloween! 

 


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More Tips on Raising Successful Children

10/23/2013

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If you have read my blog before, you know this is one of my favorite topics and that I like to write about it! But, I think it is worth revisiting from time to time. I just gave a parent education talk at a local school and these are the tips I sent the parents home with:


Keys to Success: 

Persistence, Coping Skills, Resourcefulness, Intrinsic Motivation, Delayed Gratification

Ways to help your child develop the skills that lead to success:

1.     Believe in your child and her capabilities.

2.     Expect your child to put forth effort and communicate this to him.

3.     Step Aside: Don’t do for your child what she can do for herself.

4.     Embrace mistakes: Children learn best through experience – provide an environment where mistakes and setbacks are tolerated.

5.     Encourage Resourcefulness: Give your child an opportunity to come up with his own solutions to setbacks.

6.     There’s more than one way. Model/teach that there is more than one “right” way so she is encouraged to keep trying different solutions.

7.     Foster intrinsic motivation by encouraging your child to fulfill his own needs rather than yours.                                                                                                                                                                               

8.     Delay Gratification: Model/teach your child the value of patience, waiting and focusing on the greater goal.

9.     Let go of the outcome: Parental anxiety can be a barrier to a child’s growth.

10.  Process not Product: Praise your child’s efforts rather than praising her results or her talents.          



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Is this Normal?

10/8/2013

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Parents often call because they are worried about their child's behavior. They wonder, if their child's behavior is normal.

It is normal for children to test limits, whine, have meltdowns and even lie occasionally. But how do you know if your child's behavior is not typical of his developmental stage?


Here are some indications:

The behavior causes significant strains on family relationships. Your family tends to argue more often than not.

The behavior is frequent and lasts a long time. The behavior occurs at least every day or multiple times a day and can last for long periods of time. 

The behavior has a negative impact a child’s academic performance.
Your child’s difficulty following rules or siting still is disrupting his learning (and other student’s learning) or the behavior may put the child at risk for suspension, or expulsion from school.

The behavior is negatively impacting your child’s social interactions. Your child has a hard time making and maintaining friends.

Your child does not respond to discipline techniques. When a behavior is particularly challenging, it may be difficult to find discipline strategies that work. If you feel like you have “tried everything” and “nothing works”, it may be time to seek help. Sometimes it is a matter of obtaining the right tools and resources to manage such challenging behaviors.

Even if your child is exhibiting normal behaviors you may still want to change them. This is where I come in. I can help you figure out whether the behavior is in the normal range and then come up with a plan to help you better manage that behavior and reduce the frequency and intensity of it.



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    Kerrie LaRosa is a parent coach and a mother of two children. She draws on her professional expertise and personal experience to provide tired parents with some quick tips, resources and fun anecdotes.

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