If I am slow-to-warm, it may be harder for me to keep up with my active child. If I fall on the more active end of the spectrum, it might be harder for me to slow down to the pace of my slow-to-warm child.
Let’s review the basics of temperament and how it may impact parenting. There are generally three types of temperaments (although some children may not fall neatly into one category). The first is the active child (not to be mistaken for most toddlers!). The active child typically has high energy, intense emotional reactions and may be sensitive to sensory stimulation. Next, the slow-to-warm or cautious child may be clingier at times, reserved, and needs extra time to adjust to new surroundings and unfamiliar people/situations. Last, the easy-going child is, typically flexible, goes with the flow and tends not to complain too often.
It is most effective to adjust parenting techniques to match the temperament of the child. For active children, give them plenty of options for active play; spend extra time preparing them for transitions to new activities, and be creative with parenting (lots of redirection, playful parenting and choices). For the cautious child, routine is particularly important, as is allowing in extra time to prepare for and adjust to new situations. What about the easy-going child? Don’t worry because they are so flexible, right? Wrong! It is especially important with the easy-going child to help them name their emotional state and encourage their expression of feelings because they are less likely to voice their opinion (even if they have one).
What is your child’s temperament and how does it match up with your own?